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7 days.

7 days and I miss home already. It’s not that bad in here but still when you’re away from home it leaves some kind of uncomfortable ache in your heart. I get restless. I’m sleep deprived. I wake up at 3 in the morning for no reason; no matter how tired I am of trying I can’t seem to put myself back to sleep. The worst part is when you call your mum every morning and hear she says “Kenapa mbak? Ada apa?” ; as if she could really sense there’s something wrong. I hold back my tears and blame the allergy instead. 

Day 7. 14 more to go.

Cheers.

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No!

I’m packing. Clothes. Hijab. Toiletries. Gadgets. Books. Snacks. Socks. I’m heading to Jombang in 2 days. Fricken Community Medicine. We have to be able to blend in and be with the community, communicate, assess their health problem, and come out with the best alternatives to treat them, plus prevent it from happening again in the future. Health promotion. It’s actually quite important, it’s the first line, first barrier in the community against communicable & non-communicable diseases like diabetes and hypertension. We make people aware; provide them with seminars, poster, workshop, and hopefully they’re willing to change their life style into healthier one. We can also suggest / invent health programs like arisan jamban (believe it or not there are still places where open defecation is the major concern), socmed ibu hamil, pojok makan bersama, so that they’re involved. Changing people’s behavior and lifestyle sure ain’t easy. People with low education sometimes don’t grasp the importance of things that we promote. 

I’m not much of a social person, but I know there’s no going back, it’s either you go, or get thrown away from medschool. All these years would be for nothing. So yep, I’m going, despite how anxious I get when I’m out of my comfort zone & familiar places. I’ve been snuggled up in bed with my mum for days. I’ve binge-watched tons of tv series & spent hours doing embarrassing karoke in my room. I’m going to be away for a month. As I carefully pack my stuff in the bag I can’t help but feel sad and the denial phase set in. I don’t want to go. This is KKN 2.0. No! I’m gonna miss home so much.

Guess after all I’m always going to be mama’s little girl.